Welcome back to the blog series! We are currently in the middle of this series surrounding stress. In Part I of this series, Stress: What is Stress and How to Manage It, we covered several topic areas related to stress. We reviewed a general definition of stress and how stress is connected not only to the mind/mental health, but also to our physical health/body. We also covered types of stress: good stress and how good stress can actually be beneficial to us and bad stress and the negative effects it can have on our body and mind. We wrapped up by reviewing the negative effects that too much stress can cause us emotionally/mentally and physically. If you missed out on Part I, be sure to check it out, located on the Therapist blog page, before reading Part II below.
Back from reading or rereading Part I? Good. Let’s get started. In Part II of this Blog series surrounding stress and stress management, we will explore 5 (of 11) effective ways that you can effectively manage your stress.
Ways to Manage Stress Intro
Doctor Visits
Physical Exercise
Sleep
Nutrition
Prioritize your Life
What's Next?
Ways to Manage Your Stress
If you find yourself identifying with several of the problems that we reviewed in Part I of this Blog series that can come from having too much stress in your life, then finding ways to manage your stress should definitely be the next step for you. Even if you didn’t see yourself in Part I, its’ always best to be preventive, rather than trying to put out fires later (so please read on). There are several ways that we can approach managing stress. Let’s start the list with skills related to your physical body. As we know, stress can make our bodies tense, dysfunctional, and fall into a world of hurt. Making sure that you are physically healthy is quite important because prolonged physical health problems can also begin to effect or bring more stress to mental/emotional issues. By keeping regular appointments with your doctor, having a regular routine of exercise, getting plenty of restful sleep, and eating healthy are all great ways to help with overall wellbeing and to jumpstart stress reduction.
1. Doctor Visits
Meeting with your doctor for annual or bi-annual appointments is quite important. I know, I know…why go to the doctor’s office if I’m not sick? I hear you. Going to the doctor’s office for me triggers thoughts of needles (that would be something that I would like to pass on indefinitely). However, being proactive/preventive with your health is definitely better than trying to correct an illness or a problem that has been going on for some time. So, let’s just all (including me) accept that for good health, effective stress management, and overall wellbeing, we need to visit our doctor (and consent to getting bloodwork done) at least once yearly for a check-up. During your visit, discussing any changes in your health, how your body is functioning, and what you can do to further improve your physical wellbeing are all topics that should be addressed at each visit. Changes in your health or to your body can indicate that something is going on, so it’s generally a good idea to try to take detailed notes of changes that you have handy when you meet with your doctor.
Not all doctors ask about each of these points, so be sure to be proactive at your appointments. After all, no one knows your body and the changes it is going through better than you. If you are feeling rushed in your appointment, don’t hesitate to begin or interrupt your appointment by stating that you have a list of topics that you would like to review and get their feedback on in order to make sure that you are doing everything you can in your daily life to reach and maintain optimum health. Feeling like you have a good fit with healthcare professionals is extremely important. If you are finding that you are not comfortable with how your appointments tend to go or that you are not comfortable disclosing information that may be pertinent to your health, it may be time to find another provider.
During your visit, discussing any changes in your health, how your body is functioning, and what you can do to further improve your physical wellbeing are all topics that should be addressed at each visit.
2. Physical Exercise
One suggestion that you are likely to get when you visit your doctor and ask about ways that you can improve your health is to begin an exercise regimen. As with most things pertaining to health, it is advisable to talk with your doctor (meaning don’t just read a blog post and think that is enough in terms of running it by a health professional…I’m a Marriage and Family Therapist, not a medical doctor) before starting any exercise program. Pulling from widely-available research, doing cardio workouts (workouts in which your heart rate is raised by the exercise) 3-5 times a week is generally indicated for good health. Stretching and strength-building exercises, such as Yoga and Pilates, are also indicated for improved health and well-being (and are considered to be “low-impact”).
Physical exercise is helpful for stress management and stress reduction because it helps to loosen up our muscles that get tense as a result of stress (such as neck and back tension). Not only does exercise benefit our physical bodies, but it also helps to free up and focus our mind, partially as a result of bi-lateral stimulation (more on that in future blog posts) involved in many workouts (including regular walking). Further, certain chemicals are released in our brains when we exercise that make us feel good and improve our energy levels. Who doesn’t want that?! Keep in mind that exercise isn’t just going to the gym for a huge sweat session (though you can indeed do that if that is your thing). Being more physically active can be easy to incorporate into your already busy schedule. Park farther away at the grocery store, take the stairs instead of the elevator, walk your dog instead of just letting her run around at the dog park, or mow the grass instead of paying someone to do it (double benefit – physical activity AND money saved! #StressManagement #YouAreAFinancialGuru). Remember, it’s not about having the magazine version of a beach-ready body. Exercise and physical activity, as we are talking about it here, is for the benefit of your physical health and mind. I’ll take less stress (which equals more happiness and contentment!) over a magazine-approved beach body any day.
Being more physically active can be easy to incorporate into your already busy schedule. Park farther away at the grocery store, take the stairs instead of the elevator, walk your dog instead of just letting her run around at the dog park, or mow the grass instead of paying someone to do it.
3. Sleep
Next, let’s talk about getting restful sleep. If you are of the mind that getting 4-6 hours is enough to get you through the day, please, please read on. First off, anything that you are doing to “get you through the day” is not something that you should be doing for long-term health and wellness. Life is fabulous, and just getting through it is no way to exist. There are many ways that you can get back to happiness, aka the true you that you deserve to be. Okay, I’ll get off of my therapy-can-improve-everyone’s-happiness-and-life soapbox now. Back to sleep.
Making sure that you get enough hours of sleep every night (without naps during the day) can go a long way in helping you to reduce your stress. The amount of sleep needed to give your mind and body time to rest and recharge for the next day depends on several factors (age, medical conditions, etc.), but we do know that most adults function best with an average of 7-9 hours, and children and teenagers typically need more sleep than that. Don’t fall for the myth that older people need less sleep…most research shows that that group of people still need an average of 7 hours of shut-eye nightly. Considering that the brain gets rid of waste, completes tasks related to memory and learning, and helps the body and mind to recharge all when we are sleeping, it only makes sense that we would want to do everything we can to help the brain do these much-needed tasks.
The brain is an amazing organ. We only need to give it the proper time it needs to carry out it's ever-so-important functions.
So, what if you are now planning to get the recommended 7-9 hours of sleep nightly but are having a difficult time getting or staying asleep? In any conversation about sleep, the topic of good sleep hygiene must come up. Sleep hygiene includes practices or activities that you do (or don’t do) that will affect the quality of your sleep. Read this list and compare it to what you typically do before or at bedtime:
Sleep hygiene
· The bedroom is for sleep and sex only. Try not to do other activities (watch tv, fold laundry, play on your phone, eat, etc.) in your bed.
· Limit blue light exposure (tv, cell phone, tablet) before bed. The light tells our mind to be active, which can then interfere with sleep.
· Do your exercising (especially hard-core exercise) during the day, not close to bedtime.
· Be mindful of caffeine, alcohol, and any other prescription or over-the-counter drugs that can interfere with sleep.
· Try to sleep/wake up around the same time every day (yes, even on the weekends!). It may seem counterproductive to wake up early on the weekends, but after your body gets in the rhythm, you will feel much more rested and rejuvenated by doing so.
· Do something before bed that relaxes you (ex. meditate, listen to a nature sounds cd/mp3, have a hot cup of decaf tea) and make this a routine. Your mind will start to associate that activity with sleep, and it will help you fall asleep faster and get more restful sleep.
· Turn down the temperature. Most people tend to sleep better if it’s a little chilly in the bedroom.
· Make adjustments to whatever wakes you up during the night (ex. pets making noise or crowding you, cell phone ringing, having to go to the bathroom). Move pets to the floor or into another room to sleep, turn off your cell phone (turn on emergency call features on your phone if you need to receive emergency calls from certain people/numbers), limit liquid intake for several hours before bedtime, and go to the bathroom right before you get into bed to set yourself up for uninterrupted sleep.
If you see yourself and your habits in several of the points above, try to make adjustments to your activities/schedule. Give your body and mind time to adjust. Remember, habits and patterns take time to form, so it will also take time for these new habits/patterns to form.
4. Nutrition
What you are eating (and drinking) may have more of an impact on your body and mind than you realize. It seems like every week there is a new diet fad. While some diets boast well-rounded meals and snacks in healthy portions, others focus heavily on one food group or seek to eliminate other groups entirely. I would caution you about starting any diet that you have not done your own research on. Again, being informed about your options and the possible consequences make for the best decisions and outcomes. There is so much information available to us on the internet about nutrition, as well as tons of longitudinal studies that have been completed demonstrating the effects of various foods on our bodies. Research what foods and in what amounts are healthy for your body, your specific medical conditions, and overall wellbeing. Be mindful about how much fast food, sodas, sweets, and energy drinks you are consuming (lots of studies on those foods and drinks, too). If we consider that gasoline is to a car as nutrition is to our brain/body, what are you fueling your mind and body with? Just some food for thought… (see what I did there?! hahah)
Nutrition is another important piece of stress management and overall wellbeing. What type of fuel are you giving your mind and body?
Now, let’s switch gears a little for this last strategy. This is more of a cognitive technique that you can use as part of your arsenal of tools to help you get your stress under control. Part III of this Blog series will contain specific techniques, like the one below, that you can use when trying to combat stress (like deep breathing, mindfulness, and progressive muscle relaxation, to give you a little preview of what’s to come).
5. Prioritize your life
Oftentimes, people get overwhelmed and stressed because they have too much on their To-Do list. It’s easy to see how this can happen. There seems to be a never-ending supply of tasks to get done daily/weekly: pick up the dry cleaning before work, drop the kids off at school, run back to the school because they forgot their homework in the car, commute to work, too many millions of to-do’s at work to list here, leave work, call the repairman to set up a rescheduled appointment, pick up the kids, help them with their science projects (which doesn’t feel like quality time with them anymore because it’s just another thing to get done on the never-ending list), cook dinner, send out thank you/birthday cards, clean the house, pull out some hair because the in-laws are coming to visit this weekend, feed the dog, get the kids in to bed, have a glass of wine to try to unwind, have sex with your partner (it’s not that enjoyable anymore though, because it’s just another thing that has to be done and crossed off the list), take a shower, and then get ready to do the whole thing over again.
Oftentimes, our time gets allotted to tasks that are not truly of high importance to us. What are you missing out on because of the items on your To-Do list? Does your To-Do list contain items that are beneficial to your self-care?
Going through days like this can seem like one continuous whirlwind. This is not how it’s supposed to be. Mornings will sometimes be hectic, yes, but you can still find peace and a few moments of relaxation during this time, if you are managing your stress levels. Work can definitely be a headache, of course, but considering that you are there at least 8 hours a day, there are ways that you can find enjoyment, meaning, and rejuvenation in parts of your workday. You and your partner will not always be on the same page every day, absolutely not, but time spent with your partner should be something that you guys look forward to because the time strengthens your sense of connection with each other and provides you joy in spending time with someone that you truly love and care about. You’ve determined that you have the busyness and unfulfillment that comes along with the endless to-do list, and you’ve decided that finding peace, rejuvenation, and meaningful connection with your partner and children is more of what you want, but how to do it?
It would probably benefit you (greatly) to sit down and take a minute to just breathe, free of to-do lists and distractions. Once you have taken your minute, think about the things in your life that are most meaningful and important to you. Is it spending time with your children? Or maybe drawing, or trying out new cooking recipes? Make a list of your priorities. Then make a list of tasks that take up your time in order of most demanding of your time to least demanding of your time. Now compare the lists. Does where you are spending most of your time line up with what you value most in life? If not, it sounds to me like it is time to seriously look at what you can tweak to make your lists align better. Your first thought might be, “I have to do all of these tasks! There isn’t anything that I can cut out.” I would venture to guess that that is your stressed-out brain talking. There are plenty of things that people do all the time that are unnecessary or at the least, are being done in a way that is taking up way more time than is necessary. When your mind is calm, take some time to actually write down both of these lists and then consider what you can cut out completely, what you can do to make certain tasks take less time, and who you can assign or ask others to help you out with the tasks by taking it off of your hands. No one can do everything. If you are doing everything, you are doing yourself and others a disservice. Making these changes in your life is monumentally important. After all, you only live once…and no one ever said that they wish they would have cleaned the house more.
Does where you are spending most of your time line up with what you value most in life?
What's next?
To summarize, stress can seriously mess with your body and mind. If you have had chronic or high stress levels for some time, I’m sure that you have experienced several of the negative impacts of stress. Never fear though, in this second installment of the Blog series Stress: What is Stress & How to Manage It, we’ve reviewed 4 physical changes that you can make, as well as 1 cognitive exercise/evaluation that you can do to start your journey towards better health, a clearer mind, and a better life. In the next and final installment (Part III), we will cover 6 additional cognitive ways that you can manage stress. These strategies will range from quick fixes (can be completed in 30 seconds) to ones that require practice over the long-term (but that will also provide long-term benefits to your body and mind).
If you can’t wait for Part III and are ready to start some stress relieving techniques ASAP though, head on over to the https://www.centralmstherapysolutions.com Contact page and email us to get the free 10 Ways to Manage Stress PDF (we will have a mailing list in the future where you can stay up to date on new blog posts). This PDF won’t cover everything we will be discussing in the next part of this blog post, but it will be a good place for you to start until then. And don’t worry, we won’t fill your inbox with Spam- we’ll only occasionally send you alerts about new blog posts, some inspirational materials, or helpful tips. If you feel that your stress levels have gone beyond the help that you can get from reading a blog post, but that you are definitely identifying with the negative effects of stress that you have read about, feel free to call me at the Jackson office of Central Mississippi Therapy Solutions’ - (769) 300-5259 – to set up an appointment where we can get to the bottom of what is causing your stress. Oftentimes, stress levels can get so high that our mind won't slow down enough to be able to implement the helpful tips that we have reviewed here. No shame in that: We will work together to reduce and manage the stress so that you can enjoy your life again. Reach out today. Until next time.
If you have a topic or a question that you would like for Bahar Dunn, our Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist at Central Mississippi Therapy Solutions, LLC in Jackson, MS to answer, please email centralmstherapysolutions@gmail.com. Please do not include any identifying information (unless you are comfortable in doing so), as email communication is not always a confidential medium of communication.
Disclaimer: The information in this blog post is for general information purposes only. Nothing in this post or on this website should be taken as therapeutic guidance or therapeutic or medical advice for any situation. This information is not intended to create, and receipt or viewing does not constitute, a therapist-client relationship.
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